different dimension

Last Sunday I went to a soccer game in Suwon with a few friends. We rooted for Suwon. They played Jeju, an island off the southern coast of Korea. There wasn't a huge crowd, but the fans chanted and waved flags the whole time, so it was loud and fun anyway. We lost to Jeju. There was only one goal scored the whole game. It was a cheap, good time. Unlike sports venues in good ol' America, the stadium charged normal prices for people to enjoy beer and snacks. When I say normal, I mean, not a penny more than we'd pay at the grocery store.

Like the last week of every month, this week was report card week. I had almost forty students this month, so writing all those kept me nice and busy.

The weather in Korea is a lot like the weather at home; the climate is pretty much identical. So naturally my allergies are acting up with the onset of spring. I feel alright but I sound like Steve Urkel and I had to blow my nose every five minutes during class all week. My kids were pretty understanding, I really appreciated them this week. If only I could be sick and make them feel sorry for me every week!

I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all the kinds of things you can't see from the center.

Yesterday I went to Suwon and walked around the Hwaseong Fortress. It was an almost 6 kilometer walk. My legs hurt so much they practically went numb by the end. The fortress is a UNESCO World Heritage site. It's basically a fortified wall that was built in the 1700's and surrounds the main part of Suwon. The whole walk has amazing views of the mountains and city. Suwon has some really run down buildings with lots of character. Some people there live in houses that are quite literally falling apart. I don't see poverty in my town. It's so perfect and new and full of middle class families. I like getting out and seeing what real Korean towns are like.

The fortress was beautiful in retrospect. The walk was exhausting, but that's only because my body has less energy while I'm sick. I'll definitely be going back when I'm back to normal and it's warmer.

Last night I had dinner and drinks to celebrate the birthdays (plural) of an awesome couple here. Troy is Korean and Joanne is American. Being married to a Korean and living here for like ten years, she's fluent in Korean. Anyway she's amazing because she plans trips for all the foreigners in town. In a couple weeks I'll be going on an overnight paintballing and outdoorsy thing she planned at a resort nearby. That's the next big thing I'm looking forward to. Okay, below are pictures from my weekend. I'll let the captions do the talking for me for this entry.

first quarter

The weather is really pretty here now. And this past week at work was kind of easy. Wednesday and Thursday were Market Day. The kids get fake money and the teachers set up stands with different things they can buy like stickers, school supplies and snacks. The kids get stamps for doing their homework and behaving. It's the way I discipline them. They'll be quiet and do work if I remind them that I'm the stamp god. Market Day is really fun to watch. It reminded me of being a kid, and how simple life used to be. And now I understand why the stamps mean so much to them.

Yesterday was Monthly Test day for my older students. I just watch them while they take a test, then play hangman with their vocabulary words for the last ten minutes. For my younger students Fridays are easy too, because my usual two hour classes are only one hour. We cover the same amount of material, so the class period just flies by and I never have to worry about making extra activities to fill time.

Random images of home keep popping into my head this week: good things that I used to do all the time or the way people used to look when they lied or laughed or told me about their day. And I get a little lump in my throat and have to suppress the memory or I start tearing up. It's a bittersweet homesickness, though. I like it, because it honestly makes me feel like I have it all: a great past and a dream present. I'm trying to imagine how coming home will feel. I think I'm afraid to actually. Being surrounded by "familiar" things again, an overload of what I've been craving and will have wanted for a whole year. All of a sudden being able to have them again. I can imagine the euphoria.

Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.

Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse Five

I think part of it has to do with the fact my dad is sending a care package and asked me what I'd like him to send. The list is so long, but I know shipping is ridiculously expensive, so I cut it down to only the essentials. It made me realize the things I've been living without. I hate to admit it but I miss things from home as much as I miss the people. I'm always trying to understand homesickness.

Towards the end of this week I hung out in a bar where the foreigners in this area always go. It was full of people who spoke English, but not all from English-speaking countries. There were some guys from Africa, a girl from Mexico and a guy from France. That's just of the people I talked to. Anyway, it was the first time I met people who weren't visitors, English teachers or soldiers. There are foreign students living here, too. Basically I found out there's a big group of exchange students that go to a university near me, studying abroad for their Masters. I'm so glad I met them, because now I know I have that option, too. Apparently they get paid to study here, teach some English, and they even get paid to travel! I'll be looking into the program.

I found out I get a five-day weekend about a month from now, from May first to the fifth. I'm really looking forward to that, I need a long break from teaching. I have to plan something cool OR it would also be an ideal time for someone to visit (hint hint).

Okay, I think now I'm going to go grab some ice cream at Baskin Robbins and walk around the park. It's a beautitful day in Dongtan...

eons and eons

I've entered a new phase of my time in Korea. I'm not sure how to describe what's different. A lot of small things have become better or worse. But mostly better. And change is good.

I have a bike to ride to work now, so I actually look forward to going. My bike also makes me feel more free. It's almost like having a car, because I know I can get places faster and go more places I want to go.

Yoga makes more sense now. My brain is conditioned to the Korean phrases for certain positions. I wouldn't be able to repeat what he says, but I know what to do when I hear certain words. I need to push myself harder, though. I go into child's pose too often.

Teaching is different now. I plan more than I used to. I come into work earlier and try to think of the best way to teach the lessons and make good use of time. I'm trying really hard to decide if I want to be a teacher as a career. My biggest goal now is to figure out what I'm going to do when I come home. I feel like I have 40 weeks to decide what to do with the rest of my life!

I have learned way more about the English language in the past several weeks than I did in all my years of grade school and college combined. Oh, the things I discover. Did you know Long A sounds like "a" and Long I sounds like "i"? And today I realized the word "wind" is in window when the wind slammed my classroom door shut and scared my students to death. My school won't turn on the air conditioning till it's warmer outside. Still, my kids and I already sweat to death every day, and every half hour I get a, "TEACHER HOT HOT TEACHER-ER-ER!"

Ryan asked me why I haven't written in my blog in so long. The truth is there isn't much to write about. I do a lot of the same things over and over on weekdays. Then on weekends I try to go see something touristy. This weekend I didn't do anything touristy. I did find out there are some awesome bars and adorable areas in Seoul. That city is beautiful at night. If only it didn't smell so very very horrible.

This weekend I want to stay in my small town, enjoy the park and nice weather, and save some money. On the other hand I still haven't seen or done a ton of things I want to see. I feel like a year isn't long enough to do all I want to do in this country, and I have to make every weekend count. But that exchange rate will most likely keep me at home this weekend. The amount of money I'm making here at the current exchange rate is laughable. But I'm not here for the money. (I have to keep telling myself that.)

I just finished watching Synecdoche, New York. It's a really weird movie, but at the same time the best movie I've seen in a really long time. Years even. I recommend it. Before I go I want to remind everyone that Corey's in boot camp. Please get his address from Ryan or one of my parents. I know how homesick he must feel. I'll feel much better knowing he's getting letters from friends and family. Trust me, I know it makes a huge difference.

olympic park

I spent Saturday in Olympic Park in Seoul, a very large and impressive area. Tom and I rented a bicycle carriage thing to drive around for an hour, then we got out and walked. There was too much to see in one day, so we focused on the outdoor art. I can't wait to go back to see the rest.

Along with a bunch of other stuff, that park has the coolest sculpture garden I've ever seen. A lot of the sculptures were just massive and awe-inspiring. The smaller ones were cool too. Most, no matter the size, were science-fictiony or futuristic. My three favorites were one called "Unearthed" (?), another called "Extraterrestrials," and one called "Waiting for Borges," which I regret not getting a picture of. I have pictures of the first two. Waiting for Borges was this beyond-ancient chair and table in compete decay in the middle of the woods. Borges wrote about infinite time, so I think it was what waiting forever would look like. So amazing, I can't get it out of my head.

It was really fun posing with the sculptures, too. I love art that's in nature and that you're allowed to touch. There's a cool sculpture garden in Solomons that those of you at home should go check out if you haven't already. Anyway, spending hours on end looking at art puts your brain in the mindset of searching for meaning and beauty in everything you look at. It makes you see beauty in the world, even in ugly things (like the construction site beside the park).

The day in the park made me very relaxed and happy. I wish I lived in Seoul so I could spend more time scattered here and there in the park. You could see the moon in the sky long before it got dark. It was eerie and oddly appropriate considering all the strange space-age art.

We pulled an all nighter that night. We met up with Adam and T, the new teacher. There are a couple pictures at the end of the album from that. I had a really good time hanging out with the new teacher. It was fun to show her around and see Korea through new eyes again. I've only been here for ten weeks, which is ridiculous because I feel like I've been here forever.

I bought a bike today, but didn't have time to ride it yet. I can't wait to wake up and ride it to work. Before I go in I'm going to try to find the Subway I hear is in my town. I haven't eaten turkey in over two months -- I have to fix that. God, I just hope their pickles are dill, not sweet. Koreans are obsessed with sweet pickles.

debbie downer

I want to tell you all I love you and I kind of just miss having people to say that to.

I wanted only positive blogs. That's why I sometimes go days and days without writing. But how realistic is that? Today I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Korea isn't always an amazing adventure. Real life problems exist here, too. Stop reading now if you read this blog to live vicariously through me. Stop now if you find bliss in ignorance. This entry will only bring you down.

Life is a rollercoaster. Last week I was kind of at the top, sitting there, anticipating the drop. Now I'm not even at the bottom; I'm in the underwater tunnel of the Anaconda at King's Dominion. I hate slumps, especially of the far-from-people-who-care variety.

I've had bad days in Korea. I've had homesick days and bored days. This is a new kind of bad day. The past couple days haven't been so hot. I blame Murphy's law.

The details aren't important. The one positive thing I can say about it is I know I'll grow up from this experience. In the past when I felt this way I would just walk away. But now I can figure out the best way for me to deal and hopefully use what I learn for the rest of my life. Because these days will inevitably come again.

When I came to Korea I felt like I was doing it to force myself to grow up, but now I'm afraid I'll grow up uncomfortably fast. I talked to my brother about it. He told me I can't live my whole life in one day. He knows me so well. Ever since I was a kid I've wanted to just hurry up and be an adult. Now I want to hurry up and be an old lady in a rocking chair. I can't remember a time when I just lived. Mostly I just float through it all to get from day A to day B. I have to stop thinking I can hurry up and still call that living.

Take my last entry, the whole Korea-catalyst thing. I'm not one to glorify baby steps. But maybe now's a good time to start.

This blog is a wonderful way to vent. Something's so perfect about writing it down and releasing it for billions of people to see. I've been trying to put it all in perspective. I've got to take myself less seriously. I need to remember that in the big scheme of things I'm just a speck of dust in endless time and space. So very existential, I know, but I warned you it would be like this!

On the bright side, tomorrow is Friday and the weekend is so so so close...

shaky kind of place where you could live

Whatever it is I'm doing here, I probably could have done it at home -- in time. But somehow I realize now that I needed to come here instead.

In science a catalyst provokes significant change. In fiction, it's the main character's quest, or whatever forces him to achieve a goal. You get the point. Korea is my catalyst. I'm not just the protagonist of this story; I'm the one writing.

Every day here I figure out something new about myself, about life, about the way things are and the way I've always known them to be but never stopped to think about past the surface. Every day. It's nice.

Getting settled in to life in Korea was my first goal and now that I've started to feel settled I needed a new goal. So last Monday I started taking yoga classes with some friends from work. It kicked my butt the first couple nights. I went last night and wasn't as sore after class, but during class I realized how much work I have to do in the coming months to get better.

I like yoga. It's an excellent workout, because you break a sweat from moving slowly and breathing and focusing on your own body and mind. There is "relaxing time" or meditation before and after the workout. Meditation music is played the whole time. The instructor is a kind, very zen little Korean man. He speaks some English, so I can understand and follow along. He pushes me to push myself; he's really motivating. The combination of all these things is great to help me unwind right after work.

An entry a while back was about how I've already established a daily routine. Well, I started yoga to help break up the monotony. I keep pushing myself to try new things as often as possible. But I also need that balance of familiar things to remember who I am. Striking the right balance is like an art. It's how Korea is helping me figure myself out. I came here to figure stuff out, remember? It's nice that I've been able to pinpoint one thing.

In a happy little foreign town where the stars hung upside down. A half a world away -- far far away.

This weekend the weather was good enough for a picnic in the park. Remember Dongtan has a big Central Park? Well this weekend, after several weeks here, I finally saw just how big the park is. The funniest part was a giant plastic/rubber poop with little chunks of food in it for the kids to climb on in the playground. I'll have to get a picture of that one for you guys. Kids are fascinated by poop and death here.

A couple of my friends bought new bikes this weekend, and I'm jealous. I have been thinking about buying one since I got here, and now the weather is warming up enough for it. I'll buy one Saturday and ride it around. I'm super excited. I miss riding a bike.

On Sunday I went to a town called Songtan, which is only a couple subway stops from home. It's got a military base, so it was really like little America. In fact, it felt almost exactly like walking around Fort Meade or Camp Lejeune. The town caters to American soldiers so there were places to buy pre-paid phones and my favorite...Mexican food! It has an awesome Mexican place that I guarantee I will visit many times over the next ten months. Songtan is hands down the best place I've found so far to combat homesickness.

This week at work is pretty crazy. We have a new head Korean teacher/manager who is learning the ropes. At the same time two of the foreign teachers are leaving and a new teacher just arrived to replace them. The couple who are leaving are wonderful and I'll really miss them. The new teacher seems really nice and cool. She's an American, fresh from home. I'm so looking forward to being the one to give advice for once. I'm a veteran teacher. How weird is that?

Corey's leaving for boot camp tomorrow. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to him. The last time I webcammed with him and Ryan I only saw his back go across the screen a couple times as he was packing. I'll miss him. I already miss him. Being a big sister is so worrisome!